Memoirs to Dale Jr.
By Marty Smith, Turner Sports Interactive
November 9, 2001
5:29 PM EST (2229 GMT)
COMMENTARY
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Marty Smith
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Incertitude is the supreme dictator of my mind at present.
Not only have my beloved Chicago Bears risen from the fiery depths of mediocrity and erased 15 years of futility to become one of the best teams in football, not only did the New York Yankees’ dynasty end in a year when it seemed destined to continue, not only has baseball decided to completely eliminate teams from existence, but Dale Earnhardt Jr. says he’s having trouble finding ample female companionship.
DO WHAT? Earnhardt Jr. could take my wife away if he wanted.
Apparently that’s precisely the issue -- everyone’s taken.
During an appearance on The Tonight Show with Jay Leno two weeks back, the ever-poised Junior appeared a bit rattled when asked if he was single. Earnhardt explained that the women he sees in the Winston Cup garage area all appear to be accounted for, and invited any prospective young single ladies to attend a race as his personal guest.
Major tactical error, my good man.
In the nine days since, Junior’s home, office and race shop have been flooded with flowers, pictures, letters, e-mails and hilarious phone calls from sisters attempting to set up their siblings.
"We appreciate the interest but we're not sure we can keep up with demand," Budweiser spokesman Jade Gurss told the Associated Press last week. "I don't think he knew the impact of what he was saying. Now he's got hundreds of prospective Mrs. Earnhardts calling daily.”
Hundreds? For the love of Dolemite are you kidding me? I’d be flattered if I got one measly phone call from a prospective admirer, much less hundreds of them.
Talk about big pimpin’. This is the epitome of the statement.
Forget Jay-Z, I might have to start referring to Junior as “Jay-E.” Heck, maybe even “Eazy Lil’ E.”
Either way, I’m sure Junior thoroughly enjoys the admiration from the harem his fame and fortune have garnered, but it must be difficult to accept the difficulty in meeting someone to begin an extended relationship with. Earnhardt is never home, so the prospects of a deep relationship are quite bleak.
“I suppose I shouldn't bitch, but seriously, it is hard to meet someone and spend time with them when I'm gone all of the damn time,” Junior said.
Agreed. And well said I might add.
To me, the real deal here is this: Sure, we’d all love to be famous athletes, musicians, movie stars, whatever. We’d love to have the adoration of millions, not to mention that phat bank account. But in the end, it’s not so bad to roll out of work at 6, get home by 6:30, kiss your wife, eat some dinner, watch some football, play some basketball, watch a movie.
Stars like Junior don’t get to do that much.
Then again, we don’t get to hang out with Jessica Simpson and Mandy Moore very often, either.
NOTE: Marty Smith's column appears weekly on NASCAR.com. The opinions listed here are those solely of the writer. To provide feedback to Marty, write him at marty.smith@turner.com.
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