Helton reflects on the loss of Earnhardt

DAYTONA BEACH, Fla. -- In the sobering aftermath of Dale Earnhardt's death, people worldwide sought comfort from others to cope with the untimely and unfathomable loss of NASCAR's foremost icon.

As friends and families gathered to grieve, NASCAR President Mike Helton held fast to his feelings about the loss of one of his dearest friends, rarely showing emotion despite harboring terrible grief.

Monday morning, he shared those feelings with a small group of reporters at NASCAR headquarters, making tangible a rare glimpse of the man who calls the shots in Daytona Beach. Steady and articulate, Helton discussed the magnitude of Feb. 18th, 2001, in a way no one ever has.

"I don't know how to explain it, actually," said Helton, after a lengthy pause to collect his thoughts. "I've had big losses in my life with friends and family. My father's been dead for over 10 years, and that's a big deal. I've lost good friends, too.

"But the previous losses I've experienced in my life were a section on my world. When my father died, he was my father. Everybody's got a father and everybody eventually loses their father and everybody understands that loss. It's a fraction of your world. It's a big fraction, but it's a fraction. Well, when we lost Dale, professionally he was a big fraction and personally he was a big fraction."

Indeed he was. In the NASCAR Winston Cup Series kitchen, Earnhardt was the oven. There were other ingredients that made up the whole, but Big E made it cook. He was an icon, a mentor, a virtual god to fans everywhere. It was impossible for Helton to prepare a worthy message to the masses.

“I didn’t know how I was gonna do it,” he said, a bit teary-eyed. “I didn’t know what I was going to say until I turned that microphone on. I didn’t know how to tell the world. I didn’t know how to say it.”

Making things more difficult for Helton was his allegiance to Earnhardt. He was one of Helton’s closest confidants.

“I not only had to deal with me losing Dale, but from a professional side, I had to deal with so many other people who felt so bad about losing Dale,” Helton said. “It made it more tough, you know? It’s like when your father dies, you know what your brothers and sisters are feeling like. So you all bond together.

“With this deal, with Teresa and Richard and the fans from all over the world, and their reactions and their emotions that were attached to this, it was like 100 percent of your world was affected. It wasn’t just a fraction, there was no where you could go and not be touched by it.

“This was one of those deals where, there’s nothing I could have done to not have been touched by the loss of Dale. He was a good friend, an icon of the sport. This is what we do for a living. I don’t go somewhere at 8 o’clock and make milkshakes for somebody. 24 hours a day we run racing, and he was the icon of it all. So it was a 100 percent loss.”

As days turned into weeks, and weeks turned into months, various happenings such as Steve Park’s win at Rockingham and Kevin Harvick’s win at Atlanta helped bolster the healing process nationwide. They also served to help answer questions about where NASCAR might be headed without their main attraction.

“Those were moments that, maybe not consciously, but in a way kept us going, gave us the bond, strength, desire to keep going,” Helton said. “That cycle of time, with those episodes, helped it go along where, when the point came when you could actually set back and think, ‘Man, where are we going without Dale?’ you knew we were okay.

“It was a big void, still is, but there seems to be characters that have picked up his role in that garage area. Not all of them can pick up 100 percent of it. Dale Jr., Kevin Harvick, Tony Stewart, Jeff Gordon. New guys winning races, old guys winning races. Those occurrences helped you believe that this sport could go on.”

Such instances showed the world that NASCAR would persevere. None served notice, however, more so than Dale Jr.’s win in the return to Daytona in July. That night proved the most therapeutic for Helton, everyone at Dale Earnhardt, Inc. and the NASCAR community as a whole.

“I don’t think it brought closure to the (total) wound as much as it brought closure to (happenings of) the Daytona 500,” Helton said. “That’s unfortunate for Michael, because Michael’s win and the uniqueness of him, should have been a celebration, but the timing was difficult. But with Michael coming back, and him and Dale Jr doing so well and Dale Jr winning helps the pain, but really helped close the Daytona 500.”

Still yet, Junior’s win was tainted as rumblings of a fix surfaced. Helton wasn’t amused, and Monday voiced his feeling that the sanctioning body was unfairly portrayed at times last year.

“I think there were moments that were unfair, particularly when they got more personal than they might should have been,” Helton said. “And I guess we’ve asked to be taken as a serious sport, to be treated as an American professional sport like others. We’ve been fortunate to have the energy level, fan support, the sponsorship relationships and now the TV package to deliver our product.

“So there were some challenges presented us last year that were probably fair. But I think there were others, allegations were made about cover-ups and fixes and lying, and those were made by people that didn’t understand and didn’t have their facts straight. I know that happens quite a bit, but those were pretty big issues to be uncertain about before you make your mind up.”

Helton has his mind made up about 2002 already. He’d like to see 2001 all over again, minus what happened at Daytona.

Because of what did occur here last year, and in honor of a 20-year run at DIS that included 34 wins in nearly every kind of car imaginable, a statue of the Man in Black has been erected at Daytona USA. Helton is pleased with the likeness of his buddy.

“It’s a neat deal, I just wish Dale could see it,” Helton said with a grin. “The (sculptor) did a heck of a job. It would be great if you could stand there and laugh with him about it. It feels like he’s looking at you when you look up at it.”

One would bet he’s looking down on everyone this week.

It is Daytona, after all.