Bobby Hamilton: "I don't mind telling you -- there aren't many nights that I'm not scared." Credit: Autostock

Even with cancer battle, Hamilton still has grit

Former Truck champ admits he's stopping to smell the roses

Bobby Hamilton stood anxiously on pit road at Atlanta Motor Speedway a couple weeks back, set to strap into the No. 18 Dodge truck for the final time for the foreseeable future, when Mark Martin strode by with a message.

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"Kick its ass," Martin said.

"I will," Hamilton nodded.

"See ya later," Martin said.

With that, he was gone.

"I'll probably never talk to Mark Martin again, but [that shows] Mark cares," Hamilton said. "That's just how we [drivers] are."

Hamilton has cancer. It forced him from the seat.

The very thought of it terrifies his colleagues. Drivers are apt to ignore such things.

"Let me tell you something about racecar drivers," Hamilton said with a trademark matter-of-fact tone rarely seen in today's PC NASCAR. His eyes, droopy at the edges and blue as the Bahamian coastline, never leave your gaze. They befit an ol' country boy known for saying plenty with few words.

"I had somebody around me say, 'I'm surprised so-and-so hasn't called or so-and-so hasn't called.' Drivers don't do that," he continued. "I don't even attempt to think anything bad.

"Jack Sprague called me the other day and said, 'Had a bunch of phone calls?' I said, 'No. But it's OK. The people I thought would call called, and the people I thought wouldn't didn't. But I know they care.'"

	Bobby Hamilton revealed he has cancer just before the Truck race at Atlanta. Credit: Rusty Jarrett/Getty Images
	HAMILTON: I HAVE CANCER Bobby Hamilton told the media and his peers on March 19 that he has head-and-neck cancer during a press conference at Atlanta Motor Speedway.  •   Complete story, click here

He cites past experience as proof.

"The way you know that [drivers care] is when we all lost Dale Earnhardt at Daytona, we all went to Rockingham [the next week] and raced, and none of us thought nothing when that green flag dropped except the business at hand," Hamilton said.

"That's not a bad thing, but that's what this business makes you into, that you have to put that armor up for a while, then drop it back down."

Hamilton, a gruff, tough-love type, is humbled by the experience.

"I don't mind telling you -- there aren't many nights that I'm not scared," he said. "It's not scared like being in a haunted house or something. Just little things become important.

"Suddenly things flash in front of your eyes, and seeing your granddaughter raised up means more. Making sure you tell your son you love him means more. Making sure you let the people know around you that you care, and letting your guard down to let other people tell you that they care.

"I never was that type. I was always very stern. Not necessarily a hard ass, but I've been burned by so many people -- and this business will do it -- that I'd walk around with a huge armor and never let anybody in."

The initial intention was to race through it, continue competing on weekends and attend chemotherapy treatments during the week. But after some research Hamilton thought better of it.

And if he had any reservations regarding that decision, the second week of chemo confirmed his conclusion.

	Bobby Hamilton have given his seat in the No. 18 Dodge to his son, Bobby Hamilton Jr. Credit: Autostock
	Inside the Numbers Hamilton's NCTS career stats Year Starts Wins T5 T10 1996 2 0 0 0 1997 2 0 1 2 1998 3 0 0 0 1999 5 0 1 1 2000 5 1 1 2 2001 5 1 2 3 2002 2 0 0 0 2003 25 2 10 18 2004 25 4 12 16 2005 25 2 6 12 2006 3 0 0 0 Totals 102 10 33 54 • Bold denotes championship year

Other than minimal abdominal discomfort, Hamilton felt normal following the first week of treatment.

"The first week was actually nothing -- I just felt different," Hamilton said. "The only way I know to explain it is like I drank five gallons of mud. It was just right there in my stomach, but I felt fine."

Undaunted, he decided to push a bit further the following week and join the rest of the Bobby Hamilton Racing driving contingent at Kentucky Speedway for a test session. He changed springs, gears, spent the entire day underneath the trucks tuning and turning. Lesson learned.

"I'll tell you what, Wednesday I walked up to the front of the shop to call the ambulance -- it knocked the steam out of me," Hamilton said. "I've learned I need to take it easy, not burn the energy up."

Physical energy is precious, one of life's greatest -- and most presupposed -- pleasures. It is fundamental, and thus simple to ignore until it wanes. Or worse yet, disappears completely.

Cancer can do that to people. Hamilton can't let it do that to him.

He's the rock, you see -- the nucleus. Folks turn to him for comfort, for answers, as evidenced by the moment doctors entered the recovery room to inform the Hamilton family that the lump in Bobby's neck, just under his right ear, was indeed malignant.

"I remember this clear as day: I come to in a recovery room and I heard the door open. It was my doctor," Hamilton said. "My doctor come in and seen me looking at him, and put his head down as he walked to me. I knew ...

"What else could it be when you have a knot come up on your neck? I knew. So I was asking questions when some other people came in, and right then I just flipped that switch, like I always do, to make sure they all stayed calm.

"I was looking out for everybody else instead of worrying about myself."

Plenty of folks have voiced concern and support for Hamilton. Phone calls and e-mails and face-to-face handshakes and stories. Who knew so many folks in the industry had similar experiences?

	In his first Truck Series race driving his father's ride, Bobby Hamilton Jr. took the pole at Martinsville. Credit: CIA Stock Photo
	Inside the Numbers Hamilton Jr.'s NCTS career stats Year Starts Wins T5 T10 2001 1 0 0 0 2002 1 0 1 1 2004 3 0 1 2 2006 4 0 0 2 Totals 9 0 2 5

"You don't really know how this has touched so many people around you -- you'd be surprised how many people in this garage area, [be it] family members or themselves, that have been through this and would just as soon not talk about it," Hamilton said.

"But trust me, the e-mails and thoughts of other drivers and wives of other drivers, you hear some pretty cool stories and some pretty sad stories just dealing with it.

"I go in every Monday and let them pour that crap in me, and I feel pretty beat up at times. But then I look at a 17-year old kid with a daughter in his hands, with a bald head, no hair, going through the same thing I'm going through."

So Hamilton won't sit idle. He was at Martinsville Speedway Friday to announce the May 23 Craftsman for a Cure charity event, during which fans will have the opportunity to race go-karts against Hamilton and his son, Bobby Jr., as well as Ken Schrader, Michael Waltrip, Todd Bodine, Ron Hornaday, Ted Musgrave and Saturday's Truck Series winner, David Starr, among others.

The event benefits the American Cancer Society Relay for Life and the Victory Junction Gang Camp.

Hamilton has learned much in a short time. Racing has a new role.

"Racing was my life. Racing is my motivation now," Hamilton said. "It's the only thing I like. I have no reason to sit here and pump people up, but I just love NASCAR racing. Always have.

"I just love the people around it. There's a few I don't like, but right now I can't find myself disliking anybody after what I've been going through.

"I've just learned that what we do is a neat business, but it's so easy to take life for granted. I got an e-mail from a race fan, one of about 20, and all of them had this quotation in it: 'Just remember to stop and smell the roses.' I think it wakes you up to do that."

This is a softer Bobby Hamilton. To this Bobby Hamilton, mortality is tangible.

But the grit is still there.

As I sat down beside Hamilton Friday at Martinsville, somewhat uncertain how to approach the situation, he had a sly grin on his face.

He asked me how I'd been, said he'd seen me recently on Greatest NASCAR Comebacks on CMT and that, if I didn't mind, he'd like to integrate a metaphor I'd used on the program into his repertoire.

"Tougher'n woodpecker lips -- that's great!" he said. "I love that!"

Go ahead and take it, Bobby.

It certainly applies.

The opinions expressed are solely of the writer.