| 1 |
1 |
 |
Kurt Busch |
He finally won the battle after several near-misses. And that was just with his engines. |
| 2 |
2 |
 |
Matt Kenseth |
How did he become so consistent? Let’s see. Hey Matt! New haircut? Nope. Did he get a promotion? Nope. Did I? Nope. Been working out? Nope. |
| 3 |
7 |
 |
Bobby Labonte |
He piloted the highest-ever finishing purple car in the Winston Cup Series. That’s a span of 2,000 races. And you thought Richard Petty made history. |
| 4 |
3 |
 |
Tony Stewart |
He hit a lot of cars, but none on pit road after the event. |
| 5 |
4 |
 |
Dale Earnhardt Jr. |
A damaged car at Bristol is a lot better than a dry gas tank, especially if the latter happens during a green flag. |
| 6 |
8 |
 |
Jimmie Johnson |
AWOL at Bristol as far as TOC (time on camera) goes. |
| 7 |
9 |
 |
Jeff Gordon |
He has not won since cutting his hair short. Fear the mullet. |
| 8 |
6 |
 |
Ryan Newman |
Jerry Nadeau told Newman to “use his head,” so Newman did some quick thinking. He blamed a Bodine for the crash. |
| 9 |
5 |
 |
Michael Waltrip |
In the standings, he leads all Chevrolet drivers. Oh wait, we forgot, Stewart’s in a Chevy this year. Let’s try again. In the standings, he leads all Chevrolet drivers who didn’t run a Pontiac last year. |
| 10 |
12 |
 |
Ricky Craven |
He took a brand-new Pontiac at Bristol. News flash: It’s not new anymore. |
| 11 |
13 |
 |
Sterling Marlin |
Run good. |
| 12 |
19 |
 |
Ricky Rudd |
One of the best teams on short tracks and road courses. |
| 13 |
11 |
 |
Dave Blaney |
Still learning on the short tracks, but should be in contention this weekend at Texas. Which is hilarious, because he would look funny in a cowboy hat. But not as funny as Kenseth looked when he wore the hat last year. |
| 14 |
10 |
 |
Mark Martin |
Speaking of which, he’d look pretty funny in a cowboy hat too. |
| 15 |
20 |
 |
Kevin Harvick |
New crew chief already paying off. Speaking of payoffs, the winner at Texas gets about a half-million bucks. Or about $220,000 less than a PGA Tour player gets for winning a tournament in Arizona. Go figure. |
| 16 |
16 |
 |
Jeff Burton |
Finally stopped smoking, increasing his chances of survival in the Winston Cup points chase considerably. |
| 17 |
14 |
 |
Elliott Sadler |
This wasn’t a magical repeat at Bristol, but his next-favorite track is this week. |
| 18 |
15 |
 |
Johnny Benson |
Has five top-20 finishes, but unfortunately, two are of the 19th-place variety. |
| 19 |
24 |
 |
Greg Biffle |
A wise man once said, “Let sleeping dogs lie.” This team is starting to wake up. |
| 20 |
17 |
 |
Dale Jarrett |
You need a GPS system to find him since Rockingham. |
| 21 |
18 |
 |
Joe Nemechek |
His championship hopes took a big hit this week. Hey, a guy can dream. |
| 22 |
23 |
 |
Rusty Wallace |
He shot a 67 on the golf course on Saturday, beating his losing streak by a stroke. |
| 23 |
24 |
 |
Jimmy Spencer |
He got real sick to his stomach when he saw the yellow flag come out. Good thing he wears an open-faced helmet. |
| 24 |
22 |
 |
Bill Elliott |
His wheels are red. Why? Does someone spray-paint them? Remember when Kenseth’s wheels were yellow? |
| 25 |
21 |
 |
Steve Park |
Just give him a little more time. It’s all there. |