| 1 |
1 |
 |
Jimmie Johnson |
Report: Men’s groups outraged after Johnson’s wife suspended for two races. |
| 2 |
3 |
 |
Greg Biffle |
He said that Atlanta was the worst day of his life. Which means Biff didn’t have a helicopter ride for the post-race commute. |
| 3 |
14 |
 |
Carl Edwards |
True story: We were in a sports bar watching Carl’s Busch win, and these frat boys were watching basketball on the other screen. When Carl does his backflip, one of them goes, “Dude, I must be really drunk, because I swear that NASCAR racer did a backflip.” |
| 4 |
7 |
 |
Mark Martin |
Over 10,000 fans showed up at his Ford dealership in Batesville, Ark for an open house over the weekend, putting tremendous strain on the state’s only airport. |
| 5 |
4 |
 |
Jeff Gordon |
He just bought a new Ferrari. He declined on the optional automatic transmission, which costs an extra $567. |
| 6 |
2 |
 |
Kurt Busch |
He’s going to win again at Bristol this weekend, but don’t expect him to copy Carl Edwards. Experts are split on whether his large ears will aid a backflip (parachute effect) or provide too much wind resistance. |
| 7 |
8 |
 |
Ryan Newman |
On Sunday, he's gone fishin'. |
| 8 |
5 |
 |
Kevin Harvick |
His crew chief opted to sit out the Atlanta race. And yes, it wiill be kind of funny if his suspension is overturned. That means he just burned a week of vacation. Hope he went somewhere nice. |
| 9 |
6 |
 |
Tony Stewart |
The bad: He ain’t running good
The good: Fewer interviews |
| 10 |
12 |
 |
Elliott Sadler |
He defeated media members in a game of skeet last week in Texas. Now there’s a shocker. Kind of like Dale Earnhardt Jr. winning FOX’s Sexiest Driver Contest. |
| 11 |
11 |
 |
Jamie McMurray |
Rumor has it that he is going to be on MTV’s Cribs tonight. Which explains why his tanning bed was on eBay. |
| 12 |
10 |
 |
Kyle Busch |
Some media members are already calling on Carl Edwards to quit doing backflips because he will “injure himself.” What’s next? Steroid testing for Kyle Busch? |
| 13 |
13 |
 |
Rusty Wallace |
It’s also the Last Call for Rusty’s hair. |
| 14 |
17 |
 |
Scott Riggs |
He continues to trail Tony Stewart for the Nextel Cup Series lead in beard stubble. |
| 15 |
24 |
 |
Kasey Kahne |
He drove in the Busch race on Saturday and was sponsored by Country Crock. Why not get Erin Crocker to drive it instead? Think of the cross-promotion opportunities. |
| 16 |
23 |
 |
Dave Blaney |
We fixed the logo on the left. You can quit emailing now. |
| 17 |
17 |
 |
Casey Mears |
He ran the Nicorette car at Atlanta. Their new gum is pretty tasty, but it’s very hard to blow a bubble with it. Kyle Busch couldn’t even do it. |
| 18 |
16 |
 |
Jeff Burton |
He was on The Weather Channel last week for some reason to read the forecast. For better ratings, they should have called Ward to do it. |
| 19 |
19 |
 |
Mike Bliss |
He is 13th in points, but 34th in earnings. |
| 20 |
9 |
 |
Matt Kenseth |
It’s probably a good thing he’s got that past champion’s provisional. |
| 21 |
15 |
 |
Dale Jarrett |
He needs a win before mid-season to keep team morale high in the second half. |
| 22 |
22 |
 |
Sterling Marlin |
He was pretty nice to let Reed Sorenson drive his car at Atlanta. It would have been cool to see Sterling in Reed’s car at Nashville. |
| 23 |
NR |
 |
Brian Vickers |
Still chasing that elusive top-five finish. |
| 24 |
20 |
 |
Joe Nemechek |
He’s never had even a top-15 at Bristol. We can almost hear Harry Doyle from Major League saying “Not one top-15? Not one stinking top 15?” |
| 25 |
21 |
 |
Dale Earnhardt Jr. |
His slump will give a few drivers the rare chance to be on some magazine covers. |
