| 1 |
1 |
 |
Tony Stewart |
I can't believe he had his monkey on pit road without a firesuit. |
| 2 |
5 |
 |
Kevin Harvick |
I wanted to see this question asked, just to see if Harvick would have choked the questioner: "Kevin, you led 272 laps and absolutely dominated here tonight. And yet you got beat by a guy who could barely use his left hand. How come?" |
| 3 |
3 |
 |
Jimmie Johnson |
He served as crew chief for some kids at the Soap Box Derby, replacing Chad Knaus, who is currently serving a three-race Derby suspension. |
| 4 |
2 |
 |
Matt Kenseth |
Report: Matt Kenseth's son lagging far behind Mark Martin's in media coverage |
| 5 |
11 |
 |
Dale Earnhardt Jr. |
Report: May-Ling tasered by cops after celebrating win by overturning cars in Enterprise lot |
| 6 |
9 |
 |
Carl Edwards |
Trust me on this one: If you ever go to a race, rent a FanView, keep it on Carl's scanner for the entire race, and listen to his spotter, Bobby Hudson. "Keeeeeeee-p it goin' thar, Carl. Atta baby." |
| 7 |
6 |
 |
Jeff Burton |
That was pretty bad when he entered pit road when it was closed. Burton has asked NASCAR for years to put a pole out over the entrance to pit road so you can see the light that tells you if it is open or not. But maybe they can just save money and use brightly-colored flash cards. |
| 8 |
4 |
 |
Kasey Kahne |
He is scheduled to travel to Kansas on Tuesday to be a ticket seller for a day and will autograph every ticket he sells. Which means he better Tivo American Idol. |
| 9 |
12 |
 |
Kyle Busch |
Report: Dateline NBC to dress up fans in Kyle Busch T-shirts to see if they are mistreated |
| 10 |
7 |
 |
Mark Martin |
Report: Mark Martin voted least likely to have a MySpace page |
| 11 |
10 |
 |
Kurt Busch |
I can't believe he received community service credit for throwing out the first pitch at a baseball game in Phoenix. Shouldn't the offer of community service credit been contingent on a good throw? |
| 12 |
17 |
 |
Denny Hamlin |
Bobby Jo from Paris, Tenn., writes, Dear FedEx: What does Denny like to do on his spare time? Funny you should ask. Denny was just saying he likes to relax by seeing how many stitches he can cram into his left hand before passing out. |
| 13 |
23 |
 |
Greg Biffle |
Here is my bad Subway experience of the week: Paid $20 for a meal that cost $7.94. I get $10.06 in change.
"Where is my $2?"
"The register says $10.06." (shows receipt)
"You're right. My bad."
"Can I get my $2?"
"No. I don't know how to open the register after a sale."
Like Dalton says in Road House -- "He was skimming."
|
| 14 |
8 |
 |
Jeff Gordon |
That was pretty funny when Rusty Wallace questioned his focus. And Gordon said, "Rusty doesn't really know where I go on vacation, what I do." That is because Rusty doesn't read People. |
| 15 |
16 |
 |
Dale Jarrett |
He actually sat down with his dog to discuss whether he should take the job driving for Michael Waltrip. Which is smart. Dogs don't have a long history of leaks to the media. Unless his dog is the same one in the Bush's Baked Beans commercials. Then he's screwed. |
| 16 |
18 |
 |
Jamie McMurray |
I heard that Jeremy Mayfield's wife was opening her own salon. It may be just a rumor. But she can't get Jeremy as the spokesman. McMurray is a better bet. |
| 17 |
13 |
 |
Scott Riggs |
I swear, if a 5-year-old boy watches NASCAR, he is going to think that Scott's name is actually “Riggs Who Failed to Qualify for the Season-Opening Daytona 500.” |
| 18 |
15 |
 |
Clint Bowyer |
At 15th in the standings, he is bringing up the rear for RCR. That pretty much shows how far this team has come. |
| 19 |
19 |
 |
Sterling Marlin |
If Richmond was 500 laps instead of 400, ol' Sterling might have caught up to Newman to pay him back for the hair comment. |
| 20 |
25 |
 |
Ryan Newman |
I have a feeling that after this weekend, he'll finally have more Bud Poles than Rusty Wallace this season. |
| 21 |
22 |
 |
Elliott Sadler |
I think he'd pretty much be the best candidate for the lead role as Michael Knight in the big-screen version of Knight Rider.
Elliott/Michael Knight: "Wayuh ahh we Keeyut?
"
KITT: "I can't understand you, Michael."
|
| 22 |
14 |
 |
Bobby Labonte |
He had the quote of the week: “On the last stop, the left rear tire got put on the right rear and the right rear got put on the left rear. That hasn’t happened in about a hundred years." Or since Ken Schrader's rookie season. |
| 23 |
NR |
 |
Jeff Green |
He leads the series in 18th-place finishes (4). The record is nine, set by Lake Speed in 1989. Actually, we don't know this for certain, but it sure does sound good. |
| 24 |
24 |
 |
Casey Mears |
Top-10 finishes in the three races before Jimmie Johnson left him at the airport on March 13: 3
Average finish before: 6th
Top-10 finishes since Jimmie Johnson left him at the airport on March 13: 0
Average finish since: 21st
Should Jimmie feel bad? Yeah
|
| 25 |
19 |
 |
Martin Truex Jr. |
Scary trend: The SPEED Channel "7 Days" injury curse. When Truex was on the show, his girlfriend hurt her foot and was on crutches. Then Hamlin nearly rips his hand off. This week, it's Jeremy Mayfield's wife. She is going to break a nail. |
