

Reckon how much Dupont would pony up for the naming rights to the Gordons' expected bundle o' joy? Can't you hear Mr. Corporate whispering sweet nothings into Ingrid's ear: "But baby, Rainbow Bright is a cool name for a girl."

It's been reported that crew chief Chad Knaus has decided to make false statements over the team radio because people are monitoring the No. 48 transmissions. With that in mind, do you really believe Jimmie was low on fuel and needed a caution? Chad wouldn't lie ...

If the Chase started today Burton would be in fourth position -- behind ... wait, made a mistake. Let's see, he'd be fourth behind Johnson, Harvick and Kenseth. ... This whole retrofit for the points is going to be a mess -- kinda like AT&T v. NASCAR.

Guess he's gonna lose that bet; Mark Martin won't be at Bristol. ... Not a bad month for interim crew chief Chip Bolin, who can parlay his time at the helm into a big payday. The ship is all yours, Robbie Reiser.

He was extremely diplomatic after finishing runner-up at Atlanta. When asked if Jimmie Johnson should have given him more room on the track, Smoke answered: "To be honest whatever I say is probably going to be wrong." What he was thinking: "Great, 'more room' -- another fat reference."
And this just in from e-mailer Kristy Thomas: "I think you making any fat comments about Tony is like Dr. Phil writing that diet book." Touche!

Phase 1 of Martin's retirement begins this weekend. A two-week hiatus from the grind will be spent ... at the racetrack, of course. What remains to be seen is how far he falls in the point standings. If not too far, a run for the Cup title will be the main topic of discussion at Texas.

A nonfactor at Atlanta (he ran only five laps in the top 15), Hamlin still managed a top-20 finish. He has only one DNF in 47 starts; the kid knows how to keep the fenders on.

His birthday is April 30, so what to get the man who has everything? Glad you asked; the Hummer is sold separately. Maybe Dodge will come off one of those new Nitros. It's either that or a box of Kleenex.

He just refuses to go away; four consecutive top-20 finishes and he's the lead dog for Ganassi. If the team has its arms around the Car of Tomorrow he could be in the top 10 in points when the circus rolls out of Thunder Valley on Sunday night.

It looked so promising after Daytona, but his average finish in the past three races is 23rd. After finishing first and third in his first two starts at Atlanta, Harvick's average in the past 11 races is a woeful 29.3 with zero top-10s. ... And he wonders why AMS isn't on the list to lose one of its dates.

A disturbing trend has been discovered: He has finished worse in each race since Daytona. ... And now comes Bristol, where he's finished 33rd and 31st.

Hendrick should have the COT knocked at Bristol and even though Jimmie Johnson is riding a tremendous wave of momentum, Busch may be the one staring into the rear view at the stripe. ... After all, the new car's driver compartment was enlarged to accomodate his sunglasses.

The photo is apropos for Bowyer; he scowls more than any three people you know -- even after his second sixth-place finish in three weeks. Oil of Olay would have a field day sponsoring Clint. Thing is, he has a lot to smile about. Have you seen his girlfriend?

Nice to hear he's picked up on the vernacular so quickly. But seriously, "tinkled off" just doesn't have the same umph! Sadly his pit road etiquette overshadowed a fifth-place run that should have been the focus of his day at Atlanta.

That he has two top-10 finishes in a row isn't surprising. What boggles the mind is that Edwards has led only three laps this year. Still, he's back in the top 10 in points for the first time since the 2005 season finale.

Did you know: He hasn't finished lower than 21st through four races? Gordon is off to his best start and even made the switch to T-Mobile last weekend but is having trouble finding enough friends to fill his MyFaves five-caller plan.

If a Dodge wins a COT race, the company will donate a new Avenger to the driver's charity of choice. Sign the title to the "Ryan Newman Foundation" -- and leave the windows cracked; Fido will need some fresh air.

Did he really turn down an invitation to appear on Dancing with the Stars? Apparently Busch didn't want to appear with Heather Mills; he isn't going to compete against anything more wooden than his sense of humor.

He (again) assumes the role of the top dog at Ginn Racing, for two weeks at least. Even if Nemechek wins at Bristol and Martinsville, the return of Mark Martin will be the story at Texas; he can't catch a break on or off the track.

The good news: Petty Enterprises is loaded for bear for the COT. The bad news: Britney Spears is out of rehab, which means Labonte now has to call ahead for a hair stylist appointment.

The recent success of Jamie McMurray is getting little play. Within the No. 26 stall, back-to-back top-15s is reason enough these days to get excited. It hadn't happened since Charlotte-Dover last spring.

As you can see, the dotted line still hasn't been signed:
X ............................................................................
It's only a matter of time, DEI, before the pieces come together and Junior's stock is on the rise. ... Tick, tock.

Is Gilliland the only SoCal guy not undergoing DNA testing to determine who's the daddy of Dannielynn? ... In the meantime the countdown is on to Talladega, where Yates' engines again will be a factor.

He's fallen from atop the rookie of the year standings after back-to-back thritysomething finishes. On the bright side, he hasn't crashed out (yet). Bristol should take care of that ...

Consecutive top-15 finishes may seem like a blip on the radar to some teams, but the No. 1 crew needed a good run at Atlanta. If there's one guy who needs to put it together, it's Truex Jr. Who knows what the future holds if (when?) Junior bolts DEI.