@nascarcasm Power Rankings: Gambling metaphors used on TV

One of the many hallmarks of a great broadcaster – of which we’re blessed with many – is the ability to weave bits of regional nomenclature into the broadcast. You know – playing to the hometown. Las Vegas Motor Speedway is the premiere location for this practice. Gambling terminology abounds. So much, that we’re power ranking our favorites.

This one is perfect to keep in the quiver for when a rookie driver encounters some good fortune. It just works really well for that.

Are you referencing a multi-time winner at Las Vegas Motor Speedway? Then look no further – behold, the perfect metaphor, my friend.

This is a longer one, suitable for moments when a driver is taking a risk. It’s basically the same as saying “All in” but the producer is in your ear saying “FILL MORE AIRTIME.”

This is a great one to have in your holster during pre-race. It tells the viewers “I Googled ‘Gambling Terms’ and by golly I’m gonna use every one of these in the next three and a half hours, so help me Lord.”

This is the 24-karat gold metaphor that you wait to use when a driver wrecks or suffers a DNF for a mechanical issue. In fact, you might want to add a pause between ‘win’ and ‘wasn’t’ just to give it more gravitas. You know, sort of like David Caruso would before delivering a real zinger.

Another one to which you can add a pause. “But now ... all bets are off.” Save this one for a moment when a caution flag changes the entire complexion of the race.

If you want a grade-A scene setter, start off the broadcast with this here witticism. You see, we raced here in the spring, but this weekend, it’s a playoff race. Not only that, but a win here means you don’t have to stress at Talladega Superspeedway and the Roval. I have now lost track of the many levels upon which this metaphor works.

Perfect for the cool-down lap, once the race-winner is decided. But you can only use it once, so make sure the timing is right.

We’re getting down to the wire. Only a handful of laps left. One team employs an opposite strategy, hoping to steal a win. That’s when this utterance flies out of your mouth. It’s perfect. Follow it up with something like “But will their gamble pay off?” Next thing you know, Sports Emmy.

Ever since the popularity of Texas Hold ‘Em skyrocketed years ago, this has been the best go-to metaphor. It’s versatile, and can be used for many different on-track situations. Did a team take no tires? Only two tires? Did they stay out while everyone else pitted? Everyone knows what this means. That’s why when it comes to race-broadcast gambling metaphors, this one hits the jackpot (See two slides ago).