@nascarcasm: Name ideas for Dale and Amy Earnhardt’s new baby

Did you hear? Dale and Amy Earnhardt are having another baby, and little Isla is going to be a big sister. Therefore, @nascarcasm came up with a few really solid name ideas for them to consider.

Essentially using the name to help promote your media empire. I don’t think it’s unreasonable.

Say it really fast. It will make sense.

Here, we would be naming it after the three loves of Dale’s life.

We’re trying to set up a situation a few years down the road where whenever Dale is calling for his second child from another room, it sounds like he’s just randomly yelling “HOT DAMN!” for no reason and that’d be great.

The concept here is to sell sponsorship to your child’s name. The kid’s college would practically be paid for before he or she is even born.

To my knowledge, the motorcoach lot does not yet have a super-pretentious Hollywood-celebrity name on its playground. “Rupert Earnhardt” got that nice “Downton Abbey” vibe going.

Similar concept to the fourth suggestion, except imagine if Slyddejob doesn’t hear his or her dad the first time he calls? Yes, we’re blatantly trying to re-create the famous call from Chicagoland Speedway and not ashamed.

Because it is possible by the time the child makes his or her way into NASCAR, our current crop of Ryans will either be retired or leaving full-time competition. We must replenish our Ryans.

Dale is a known eBay aficionado and could consider naming the child something eBay-related, for instance, common eBay seller feedback.

Like a previous suggestion, a name based on more things Dale absolutely loves.