| 1 |
1 |
 |
Tony Stewart |
Things are good for Stewart. Last year, he was under pressure for slapping at Brian Vickers. This year, his biggest problem is that he highlighted his hair to match the guy he slapped last year. |
| 2 |
3 |
 |
Rusty Wallace |
He is a leading candidate for a TV job for the mere fact that you know he can say "McMurray" without any difficulty. |
| 3 |
6 |
 |
Kurt Busch |
He turns 27 on Thursday. But he’s going on 60. |
| 4 |
7 |
 |
Ryan Newman |
Report: Newman fails to show to watch Wallace brothers race in St. Louis. |
| 5 |
2 |
 |
Greg Biffle |
His dog calendar would sell a lot better if one of the dogs -- preferably Dale Earnhardt Jr.'s -- had on a blonde wig and a swimsuit. |
| 6 |
4 |
 |
Jimmie Johnson |
Press release we saw last week: "Jimmie Johnson Drives Fans Wild with Rare Canadian Appearance at the Levi Strauss Signature(R) Fit Pit." |
| 7 |
8 |
 |
Mark Martin |
It looks like he will have to drive another year. I never liked his slogan, "Salute to You Tour," anyway. This is NASCAR. It should be "Salute to Y'all, Tour." This is his chance to fix it. |
| 8 |
5 |
 |
Matt Kenseth |
He hinted that he might not be with Roush Racing by the time Jamie McMurray gets there. Which means Kenseth will miss out on McMurray's hair expertise -- unless Kenseth goes to Hendrick Motorsports, where he can get help from Vickers. |
| 9 |
11 |
 |
Carl Edwards |
He said he didn't mean to get into Kasey Kahne in the closing laps at Pocono. He actually meant to get into Jeremy Mayfield. Wrecking Kahne doesn't help the Chase chances. |
| 10 |
12 |
 |
Brian Vickers |
Every now and then, when we need a good laugh, we will look at the clip of the tape of Vickers spinning out Mike Bliss in the Open, and then think of Jeff Gordon hitting Bliss after Chicago and think, "Man, Bliss hasn't been shown much love from Hendrick Motorsports in 2005." |
| 11 |
17 |
 |
Ricky Rudd |
As Fatback gets slimmer, his media coverage suffers. |
| 12 |
10 |
 |
Jeremy Mayfield |
He was relieved that Ford-Kasey Kahne case was dismissed. He wasn't looking forward to purchasing a suit for the trial. |
| 13 |
9 |
 |
Dale Earnhardt Jr. |
His pit road speeding penalty at Pocono was clocked at 143 mph. Or, as Kirk Shelmerdine calls it, a qualifying run. |
| 14 |
14 |
 |
Bobby Labonte |
This poor guy has so many rumors floating around him that it's preventing Jayski from leaving the house. |
| 15 |
15 |
 |
Jamie McMurray |
He went on vacation to Mexico. You note that he didn't go to Ireland, mainly because the airlines don't allow you to carry on a tanning bed. |
| 16 |
13 |
 |
Kyle Busch |
A win at Indy would be worth $1 million, or $500,000 for each of his female fans. |
| 17 |
25 |
 |
Kevin Harvick |
Now RCR is looking to bring in Paul Tracy, to the fold. Just as soon as Kevin Harvick got comfortable with all his teammates. |
| 18 |
18 |
 |
Joe Nemechek |
About once a year he'll shock everyone and actually win. Kind of like the Tampa Bay Devil Rays. |
| 19 |
16 |
 |
Dale Jarrett |
He is testing the new Fusion for Ford at Atlanta Motor Speedway on Tuesday. Hopefully it helped him avoid two days of testing at Watkins Glen, which is only slightly more fun than testing bulletproof vests. |
| 20 |
20 |
 |
Jeff Burton |
A NASCAR.COM poll last week found that two-thirds of fans would hire Michael Waltrip over Ward Burton. Which means Ward didn't get out of the woods in time to cast a vote. |
| 21 |
24 |
 |
Jeff Gordon |
His "Drive for Five" has turned into "Drive for a Mere Top-Five." |
| 22 |
21 |
 |
Kasey Kahne |
His legal fights with Ford won't hurt any of Ford's car sales much, because a lot of Kahne's fans drive Honda Civics and Volkswagen Beetles. |
| 23 |
19 |
 |
Michael Waltrip |
There are no plans to currently build a museum to house all of Waltrip's commercials that he made with DEI, but I am calling on a few cities to submit bids. |
| 24 |
22 |
 |
Elliott Sadler |
He was in Mexico during the off-week also, although he had a whale of a time getting a bologna burger down there. Oh, they have bologna burgers down there. They just couldn't understand what Elliott was saying. |
| 25 |
NR |
 |
Scott Wimmer |
His new kid has already been signed by Toyota, who won't have a Cup car ready until he's 18 anyway. |
