| 1 |
1 |
 |
Tony Stewart |
Report: Tony Stewart eats all the candy after bashing open the Mayfield piņata |
| 2 |
2 |
 |
Matt Kenseth |
ESPN Magazine still hasn't called him to duplicate the Carl Edwards shirtless cover. |
| 3 |
3 |
 |
Kasey Kahne |
Not much funny about him this week, but here's a tidbit: His three Nextel Cup victories have come on different days (RIR, Saturday; TMS, Sunday; AMS, Monday). |
| 4 |
5 |
 |
Kevin Harvick |
I can just hear what he was thinking in the closing laps: "I can't wait to see what the new contract looks like when Childress gets back from vacation!" |
| 5 |
4 |
 |
Mark Martin |
I don't understand it. Teams simply don't market their sponsor well. After the wheel fell off, they should have used that opportunity to call AAA. |
| 6 |
6 |
 |
Jimmie Johnson |
Report: Chad Knaus all set for his 2006 restrictor-plate debut |
| 7 |
12 |
 |
Jeff Burton |
Report: Ward Burton takes two hours to say, "Prilosec" and three hours to say, "Prilosec, OTC" |
| 8 |
8 |
 |
Jeff Gordon |
He was pretty miffed that he wasn't picked to tire-test for Goodyear at Indy. So was Stanton Barrett, but geez, the media just flat-out ignored that. |
| 9 |
7 |
 |
Dale Earnhardt Jr. |
Report: Jayski nearly falls down basement steps when learning that Dale Jr. will run a black car at Talladega |
| 10 |
10 |
 |
Kyle Busch |
True story: His back was severely sunburned last week. He was cleaning a pool without a shirt. To clarify: It was his own pool. He wasn't performing pre-trial community service. |
| 11 |
14 |
 |
Bobby Labonte |
He actually said, "Bring it on," when asked about Talladega. The boy is all fired up. |
| 12 |
23 |
 |
Clint Bowyer |
I got an e-mail from his brother Andy right after the race. From his typing (he was pretty happy), I think he drank a beer for every lap Clint led. |
| 13 |
9 |
 |
Denny Hamlin |
Denny, in your next FedEx spot, please run the lawn mower over the guy holding the piece of paper. He is getting really annoying. |
| 14 |
21 |
 |
Carl Edwards |
Just a quick update on the team member who has refused to shave until Carl wins again: He ain't looking too sporty. That beard is as long as Tony Stewart is round. |
| 15 |
18 |
 |
Greg Biffle |
Tom Cruise's new daughter got more publicity than anyone in the world last week. Greg Biffle's girlfriend was a close second. |
| 16 |
11 |
 |
Dale Jarrett |
I have decided that I really want Dale Jarrett to go to Toyota, if only for the mere fact that he will have to change his dealership to Dale Jarrett Toyota. "Come on down! We got a new shipment of Priuses!" |
| 17 |
15 |
 |
Kurt Busch |
Report: Phoenix cops clock Busch doing 23 mph on highway leading to PIR |
| 18 |
13 |
 |
Scott Riggs |
Last fall at Talladega, he wrecked and turned his car into something the size of a Kia. After he got out of the infield medical center, his crew chief was waiting, and Scott tells him, "Sooooo ... you get my car fixed yet?" |
| 19 |
19 |
 |
Martin Truex Jr. |
He was actually moved from 12th to 22nd after a last-lap pit road speeding penalty, and a lot of people wondered why. Then, in his post-race press release, Truex was quoted as saying, "I honestly tried to speed." Hey now. Case closed, right? |
| 20 |
20 |
 |
Reed Sorenson |
He became the first person to actually blow a bubble using Nicorette gum. |
| 21 |
16 |
 |
Jamie McMurray |
Kyle Busch should have let Jamie McMurray clean the pool. Mac-Mary has a lot more ultraviolet ray experience. |
| 22 |
22 |
 |
Ryan Newman |
Just a bad, bad year. He's got fewer poles then Jeff Burton, as many wins as Rusty Wallace and fewer top-10s than Petty Enterprises. But he leads the series in damaged blue wheels. |
| 23 |
25 |
 |
Casey Mears |
Casey Mears should actually call Kyle Busch and thank him for hitting his car under caution. It was the most camera time Mears has gotten in a month. |
| 24 |
17 |
 |
Elliott Sadler |
Ah got cawt up en nother craw-ash. |
| 25 |
NR |
 |
Sterling Marlin |
Every year at Talladega, I always see the same three Marlin fans. They are from Lewisburg, Tenn. I can't wait to see them in the new green-and-gold T-shirts and hats. They are going to look wonderfully awful. |