Column from 2002 recounts birth of son, support of NASCAR community
RELATED: Steve Byrnes passes away at 56 | NASCAR statement on Byrnes
WATCH: President Obama offers condolences to Byrnes’ family
Editor’s note: From 2002-2007, Steve Byrnes called every week for a race preview. I couldn’t wait for his 803 area code to pop up on Thursdays, and he became a personal and professional mentor.
In January, the number appeared again. Once more, we worked together on a story. This time, it was about Byrnes being named to the NASCAR Hall of Fame Voting Panel. He shared wisdom and perspective on his battle with cancer and his support of our colleague Holly Cain. The next day, he wrote "Reminded me of the old days!" and "Glad you are in her corner, and mine!"
The entire NASCAR family was in Steve’s corner as he and wife Karen prepared for the birth of their son, Bryson, on July 23, 2002. Steve’s column from 13 years ago "reminds you how connected we can be with each other if we want to," a quote from his conversation with Cain 13 days ago for a story on his 56th birthday. — Stu Hothem
I enjoy the opportunity to contribute [on FOXSports.com] because I’m able to share things that I can’t during a NASCAR on FOX broadcast or a "Totally NASCAR" show on Fox Sports Net. I’m also given a forum to express opinions, concerns, human interest stories or my unbridled passion for the Maryland Terrapins (Class of 1981) and the Washington Redskins.
In any case, I’ve struggled with this particular column, though not for lack of subject matter. On July 23, my wife, Karen, gave birth to our first child, Bryson Parker Byrnes. This article could most certainly be about the joys and frustrations of parenthood or how I feel when he smiles at me as I clumsily change a diaper. Great material to be sure, and I’ll happily bore you with proud father stories in the weeks to come, but I’ve decided to write about what happened before Bryson was born.
The reason I’m conflicted about this column is I don’t want it to appear self-serving. I pride myself on having positive professional relationships in the sport, but over the past 17 years, I’ve been careful not to get too close to the competitors. I would rather they respect me than like me.
Having said all that, I also want you to know that there are some very nice people in this sport. People who have compelled me to share "Thanksgiving in July."
My wife and I tried for many years to have a baby and were incredibly thrilled when we got the great news last Thanksgiving weekend that we were pregnant. We felt even luckier when we figured out that our baby was due in July after the FOX half of the broadcast schedule concluded on July 6.
Little did we know how complicated our lives would become.
The weeks clicked by pretty quickly early in the season as Bristol, Texas and Martinsville gave way to Talladega, Fontana and Richmond. With the exception of torrential rain at Texas and Richmond, I was convinced that the pregnancy was routine.
Unfortunately, I was wrong.
Travel tougher with trials at home
The week before The Winston — which was actually Nazareth, Pennsylvania, for me as I worked the booth for the Busch race — we spent a night in the hospital as my wife started experiencing painful contractions. At that point, a premature delivery was a scary proposition. I knew to be scared when our doctor considered sending us to another hospital in Charlotte, but by early morning, the contractions subsided. Dr. Mark Peacock sent us home, but instructed my wife to take it easy.
We made it through the Coca-Cola 600, and Karen started cutting her hours back a bit at work. The month of June is the toughest travel month for the NASCAR on FOX crew. We go to Dover, Michigan, Pocono, California and Wisconsin on consecutive weekends. We did double duty during the Michigan weekend, traveling to Nashville for Saturday’s Busch race and again the next week in Pocono as we did the Kentucky Busch race on Saturday night.
I checked my voicemail when I got back to the motel room after the Busch race at Dover, the first race weekend in that stretch. I felt panicked and sick to my stomach when I heard my wife bravely say, "Don’t worry, but I’m in the hospital." I felt helpless and contemplated going to the airport until I finally got her on the phone in the hospital. "Not to worry," Karen said, "Dr. Peacock just wanted to be on the safe side. There’s no need for you to come home."
Well, I’m not the sharpest knife in the drawer, but I knew we were in trouble.
I barely made it through the Winston Cup race that Sunday in Dover. They tell me Jimmie Johnson won, but I don’t remember much. To make matters worse, Larry McReynolds and I got stuck in a traffic jam five miles from the Philadelphia airport that night and watched our U.S. Air flight head to Charlotte without us.
That Tuesday night we were back in the hospital, and Karen spent the rest of the week being pumped full of a nasty drug called magnesium sulfate. Finally, the contractions subsided, but the doctor ordered her to stay in bed for the remainder of the pregnancy or risk premature birth. When I say "stay in bed," I mean she was able to walk the four steps to the restroom and back to bed.
So here’s where the "Thanksgiving" is actually my way of giving thanks. To say I was treated kindly is an understatement. I will never forget the many acts of kindness, big and small, during this time, and I want to share them with you.
Team members are friends indeed in time of need
I was very nervous about going to Sears Point, California. Three thousand miles from home might as well have been Nagano, Japan. I called Neil Goldberg, our producer, and shared my fear. Within hours, Neil and Pam Miller, our pit producer, formulated a game plan. Artie Kempner and Richie Zyontz, the director and coordinating producer, called me at home and told me not to even consider coming to California. My absence caused Matt Yocum and Dick Berggren to work even harder, and Jeff Hammond left the air-conditioned confines (and the righteous food) of the Hollywood Hotel to fill my slot.
It was strange to watch the FOX broadcasts on television, but I was very proud of my teammates and more thankful to have them as teammates.
Oddly enough, one of our producers, Barry Landis, and his wife, were going through a similar experience at the same time. Barry’s wife, Lindsey, was put to bed in March and had the same exact medicine and monitoring program Karen had. Barry and I relied on each other a great deal during this time and joked that we were going to appear on "Oprah" together to share the expectant father’s side of the story. We decided that our wives wouldn’t think that was a good idea. Thankfully, Barry and Lindsey are now proud parents of baby Emma.
Darrell and Stevie Waltrip offered me their airplane, and support, in the closing weeks of our schedule. Knowing that I could call at a moment’s notice was a tremendous comfort. Thank you.
My teammates at "Totally NASCAR" gave me lots of room and never said a word when I started skipping post-show production meetings so I could get home and feed my wife. Thanks for picking up my slack.
‘Being a father is the most important thing in my life’
Elliott Sadler, Jason Keller, Dale Jarrett and Ken Schrader all offered me the use of their pilots and planes, and all stopped on pit road to ask about Karen week after week.
Todd Bodine stopped me in the garage area one day to ask about Karen. His career was in a tremendous state of flux at the time. His Winston Cup ride was all but folded because of a sponsor problem. He took the time to encourage me and put my mind at ease. "Racing is what I do for a living," Todd said, "but when I see my daughter, I realize that being a father is the most important thing in my life." I thanked Todd for the perspective and was struck by his positive attitude during a tough time.
Karen’s considerable career came to a screeching halt when she was put to bed. She never complained. I must also say having witnessed my son’s birth that words are inadequate to thank her, or any mother, for what they endure to deliver a child. Thanks for being my son’s mother and my wife.
There are many more thank-yous to write: neighbors, family, friends and healthcare professionals await.
Thankfully, I have a lot of stamps to buy.
